when we heard that they found mr. lewis hanging from the chandelier in the foyer,
i hear my mother say something about selfishness. but i don't hear, or listen.
say what a finale, say that's just how i'd go:
in the lights, all cut glass and crystal halo kaleidoscoping around my head.
just tryna make myself an angel. or anvil. come down heavy from a high place
just to end up 6 feet below; say he must've been hanging there for days,
just tryna hold up his own wieght. say how's that for a show? ain't we all
just tryna mean something to someone? more than just the curtain draw,
lights fade as we shuffle out, one by one. more than this.
say what's more selfish— leaving or expecting someone to stay against their will?
say what is a will but a list of reasons to stay?
see i'm not so worried that my mother will not forgive me, but herself,
and will that be enough to stay?
say everyday i think about leaving and all it does is keep me here, just in case.
don't wanna miss a thing, don't wan