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Deviant for 7 Years
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this crowded mausoleum
say willy & michael & matt & jeremy & ian
and look at how their names become a song

see: boy stomaches an entire medicine cabinet to fill himself
see: boy becomes asteroid and lands, face first, on the interstate
see: boy origami folds his car around a tree in the forest,
or, boy is the tree and falls to the floor of a concrete jungle
and makes a sound. every time.

see how i’m the unaffected third party.
perhaps i killed them with my silence
see this smoking barrel of a tongue
say nothing about what i have seen
though nowadays funerals all feel like reunions
except in black and without the dancing.

see all this dirt on my shoes?
say i’ve got three states and a thousand miles in my soul so
i had my share of lookin’

like how we survived the mayan apocalypse
but not the knives or pills or keys
and there’s got to be a lesson in there somewhere, there being the bodies.
as if the beautiful corpses are any less dead, so goodbye i guess
to all you poets, and the words that have died along with you;

say that i miss you, my god, how i miss you all.
quite a few sir, she says, and lays down her weapons. i guess it’s been a long
time since i’ve felt like home in my own frame.  the air becomes nails
and i offer up my hands. say, i am not here to fix but build upon though
that is to say it can never be undone. see, i too have scrapped my bones
with sheet metal and mirror in the hopes that you can see yourself in me;
say you can fill the nascent gaps and together we can hold off the sky. and i
never had any weapons to begin with, so i hope my walls will be enough.
we'll see, she says, and stops up the blood.
you ask about the lost angels,
something about the way a bird falls when broken.
you ask if there's a heaven for the hounds.

you've seen them, you say. the mouths. how they lick
the bones clean, lips smacking though they may be.
and of course there’s no need for leftovers; yesterday the boys
came and stripped bare what they wanted.

but it’s not always a feast, you say. sometimes they come
in the night and there’s not enough food. sometimes the flock
devours itself from the inside out.
goodbye summer of 2010.
rip summer, i guess
no more endless than life.
rip poppy,
willy & savannah & michael & matt & jeremy,
rip uncle bob, you toddler at play,
rmr klager, and the lessons you had yet to teach,
rip pop pop, you goddamn miracle.
goodbye to my guy harvey truck
and the playground at veteran’s park,
rip childhood, fading now in the rearview;
rip mike bell, you statue.
goodbye to narnia and its litter,
the hobbit hut, that ticking time bomb
and rip to all the tears and smiles set off inside them both.
rip to my crazy pants, the ones dad got in atlanta in the 80s,
for teaching me not to give a fuck,
goodbye fucks, and the pockets that i kept you in;
it’s been years and you have not found me yet.
rip to Mayan apocalypse and the bodies you did not take,
rip to the knives and pills and keys for those that you did.
goodbye to the poets and all the words that have died along with you,
rip to the birds but not cages and there will be more songs to sing;
rip to this one, for i am done singing:

there are too many ways to say goodbye and not enough
to say that i miss you, my god, how i miss you all.
write a lot about the blood without so much as breaking
a bone. but still not whole. like the boy who tries running uphill
only to tumble down each time. but still not the boy without legs.
this boy who cries for strangers, say what have i done
to deserve this sad, not enough to earn even a tear.

see these days just a limbo between smiles, write a lot
about that, boy beats back childhood with fear of future,

all skinned knee and no bicycle, learning again to walk
or at least stumble forward.

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Add a Comment:
azuline-furcula Featured By Owner Sep 15, 2016
thank you.
successwithhonor Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2016  Student Writer
arabesque-o Featured By Owner Sep 15, 2016  Student Photographer
I like your pretty words.
successwithhonor Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2016  Student Writer
i like that you like them
:heart: :rose: :coffeecup:
lunaticofsilence Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2016
Thank you very much for the favorite! :sun: :') :) May peace be with you.
sundaysoon Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank'ya greatly
TheKerwinator Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2016  Professional Writer
Thank you! :D
MisfitableGrae Featured By Owner Oct 9, 2015   Writer
omg holy shit i just saw that you suggested one of my poems for a DD, that's honestly amazing?? how dare you i love you so much thank you so so much i freaked when i saw youre absolutely perfect youre literally amazing???? thank you thank you holyyy thank you
successwithhonor Featured By Owner Oct 13, 2015  Student Writer
MisfitableGrae Featured By Owner Oct 9, 2015   Writer
lost my chill for a bit there, but im chill now
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